I have a tradition – I never, ever vote in flat shoes. I always wear a pair of vertiginous heels when I make my way to interfere with democracy’s box. That didn’t quite come out right. Put a cross in the box of democracy. A little better.
Yes, I believe that one should be jacked-up in one’s biggest, tallest mother f***ers to participate in ‘democratic process’. Preferably one should also wear a red lipstick, although this isn’t mandatory; pink will also suffice.
Why is ‘democratic process’ in inverted commas? Because we don’t have a voting democracy as such here, in Britain. We have a very sympathetic electoral oligarchy; the political equivalent of Agatha Christie’s Miss Marple. She’s interested in what you might think, and will take tea with you, but she’ll do what she bloody well wants and will glare at you if you cross her.
Today, however, in stark contrast, the European referendum is a direct expression of the purest form of Ancient Greek democracy – demokratia, the rule of the people – as introduced in the sixth century BC. Yes, BC, not ‘CE’ or any shit like that. Bugger off if you don’t like it. I also believe in using ‘ae’, as in ‘mediaeval.’ And don’t get me started on ‘an + h’.
Anyway, today, one vote counts as one vote. All to be totted up to decide the question:
‘Should Britain remain in the EU?’
And with polls indicating a knife-edge division of opinion, I was doubly grateful to have voted in my Stella McCartneys. You see, wearing heels ensures that if the result doesn’t go the way of civilisation, progress and hope, you still have the lovely memory of wearing a wonderful pair of shoes out.
For those of you interested, I voted ‘Remain.’
Why? Because I believe in the transformative power of democracy. I believe in staying in situations to help others – and in the long term profitability of mutual assistance. I don’t believe in quitting – especially when the arguments to leave involve racism and xenophobia. Fear of the future is not a reason to leave the EU. A desire to make more money is not a reason to leave the EU. Boris Johnson’s divine hair is not a reason to leave the EU.
I’m looking out at my garden now – at an England that’s flooding and grey and dismal. Am I scared for our futures? Yes. Did I vote out of fear? No. I voted for people, for hope and for reason. And I did it in heels hoping that today we don’t give the toe to Europe.
© gvons 2016